Plumb Squirrely for Squirrels
When I was a kid, we had one of those homemade 55-gallon-drum barbeque pits, and on many-a-Sunday growing up, we’d have some great family barbeques. The barbeque meat was usually pretty standard fare, but one day, a friend of ours came over with some squirrels and threw them on the pit. I had never heard of anyone eating squirrel. I remember lifting the lid and seeing them on the expanded metal cooking surface and thinking they looked like rats. I tried one, but didn’t like it. Then, the friend started talking about the great squirrel hunt he’d had back home the weekend before. Where was home? East Texas.
In 44 counties in East Texas, squirrel hunting is a huge deal. There’s even a special season, with a bag limit and everything, which starts on Oct. 1 and runs through Feb. 22. There’s a Youth-Only season Sept. 26-28 and an additional opportunity to hunt them from May 1-31. In case you’re wondering about the other 210 counties in the state, there’s a season for them too – it’s year-round with no bag limit.
And that bring us to this week’s tale; a squirrel tale, if you will, courtesy of Retired Game Warden Milton “Bubba” Vincent. For a time, Bubba was stationed on the Texas/Louisiana border in Newton County. For three years running, he and his partner, the late Jack Chancey, had heard about a hunter from Louisiana who would slip over the border a week or two before squirrel season opened and trespass onto a hunting club to hunt.
One morning about two weeks before the season opened, Jack and Bubba heard shots on the hunting club property, figured it was their guy, and decided to creep down on him. They got real close to him and announced themselves, “State Game Wardens!” Without hesitation, the guy started running. The only problem was that he wasn’t very fast and he kind of had a limp. It didn’t take long before Jack and Bubba were running next to him with a warden on each side.
Bubba grabbed the shotgun, and Jack grabbed the poacher. Then they all three went to the ground. The guy never struck at the wardens; he just rolled around in the mud and the leaves and tried to squirm away so he could limp-run his way out of his predicament. However, his hopes were dashed as soon as he was handcuffed.
Jack and Bubba took the guy into town to see the justice of the peace. He was charged with hunting squirrel in a closed season and trespassing. The wardens didn’t charge him with evading arrest, mostly because a lot of folks back then would run when they saw game wardens. It was just part of the game. The judge assessed a fine, and the guy paid it on the spot. He then went on to tell the judge about what good game wardens Jack and Bubba were because they were the only ones who had ever caught him. He then posited that they might not have caught him this time if he hadn’t of had a bad hip. Then he said, “I’m hungry. Let’s go get breakfast.”
So, Jack and Bubba took the guy to the only café in town and broke bread with their law breaker. When asked why he had done what he did, the guy said, “I passed up a limit of squirrels before I crossed the river. I just like hunting in Texas. I quit when the season starts.” He then proceeded to tell everyone in the café about what good game wardens they had in Newton County.
Though the guy offered to buy, the wardens refused, and after breakfast, everyone went on about their ways. Yep – some folks are plumb squirrely for squirrels.
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