Think Twice and Don’t Be a Dummy
In the mid-to-late nineties, Game Wardens Neal McCarn and Garland Burney were kind of the mad scientists of deer decoy (dummy) innovation in South Texas.
Though decoys had already been used for years, getting the funds to have one made and put into use wasn’t always in the district budget.
So, Neal, who was stationed in Mathis (San Patricio County), and Garland, who was stationed in George West (Live Oak County), pooled their personal funds together and made their own.
They ordered a full-body form and fitted a hide on it as best they could. Then, they screwed on some antlers and gave it the name “Bullwinkle”.
Bullwinkle was a nice 10-pointer, but not too nice. If the antlers would’ve been too impressive, whoever might have shot it could’ve possibly claimed entrapment. Anyway, Bullwinkle worked well and was shot many times, but Neal and Garland, like all mad scientists do, kept tinkering.
When they received their official Texas Parks and Wildlife issued decoy, complete with detachable plastic antlers and various and sundry remote-controlled parts, they used it in a dual-deer setup where Bullwinkle was the buck and the unnamed TPW deer was the doe.
The wardens even experimented with reflectors they got from the Texas Department of Transportation to create a realistic eye reflection at night.
They eventually came up with a setup that used small white reflectors wrapped in green cellophane recessed into PVC pipe that
they painted black.
These reflectors were then placed onto rebar stakes and set off to the side of the decoys just enough – maybe six to eight feet away - to convincingly reflect off the headlights of any vehicles that passed by.
On a typical decoy night, Neal and Garland would set up around 10:00 p.m. and then pick everything up right before daylight. It made for long nights, but they had some interesting encounters.
One night, a guy took a shot at Bullwinkle, and when they stopped him, Neal asked, “What were you shooting at?”
The man said, “You know, I shot one of those ‘statue deers’ I’ve been reading about in the newspaper.”
Then the man said, “You know what, sir? Those things really work!”
On another night, a man got out of his vehicle with a .22 and started shooting at Bullwinkle as he walked towards him.
Neal and Garland got to the guy while he was still shooting and announced themselves, “State Game Wardens – STOP shooting!” But the man ignored them and kept on until he ran out of bullets.
When the wardens finally got to the visibly perplexed guy, he said, “You know, I shot him about 5 or 6 times, and he just wouldn’t go down!”
Then again, there was a night when Neal and Garland were joined by Game Warden Steve Woodmansee. It was around 1 a.m. when a truck stopped. A shot rang out. After a pause, the truck sped off.
Neal and Steve were on them in no time and stayed in pursuit for several miles until the driver of the truck finally gave up.
The vehicle was occupied by three individuals who were headed home to Freer from a wedding in Corpus Christi. Still in their wedding attire, the bride and groom were in the back seat, and the best man/Bullwinkle-shooter was in the front.
Yep, Neal and Garland had a lot of fun dealing with dummies shooting dummies over the years, but they are both happily retired now and out of the biz.
But don’t you worry – there are still guys like Neal and Garland out there… tinkering. The possibility of running into a new and improved version of Bullwinkle on a desolate road on a cold winter’s night is still very real.
So, if you ever find yourself tempted to shoot a deer off the road, think twice about it, and don’t be a dummy!
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